DAY #10... AND BEYOND: KINDERGARTEN AGAIN.....AT AGE 65!!!

 

So now what do I do?  Retirement has been great so far but now I need to move forward. 
Kathryn has settled down in San Diego...

and the photos she sends back continue to be breathtaking!!!

Her dad Peter has settled into his new Assisted Living Facility....

...and the cowboy hat is resting, awaiting it's next outing. 

As for me, I got new glasses (yup, they're ugly) ....

... and some dangling earrings!!  (Yup, they're ugly too!)

Looks like I definitely need  a new makeover in this "New Beginnings" process that I'm starting.

I have, however, started a Bucket List.  ( Question:  Can you even HAVE a Bucket List when you start Kindergarten at Age 65??? !!!)  Here are some items so far on my list:

1)  Do more things with photography...

2)  Decorate.....again!!

3)  Visit my mother and family more often...  (Oops!!!  guess I should have made that #1!!)

4) Visit my hometown of Grand Marais more often...

5)  Travel more...

6)  And definitely rest more!!

6)  And don't forget from time to time to stop and smell the roses!

Looking back, I have been richly blessed with a wonderful family and long-lasting friendships... a fantastic work history... a beautiful hometown... an awesome daughter... and a dedicated friend who just happened to be my ex-husband.  It's been a great life so far, and looking forward, I feel there are many new friends to meet, and more exciting days to come.  In fact, I can't wait for my second day of Kindergarten!!! 

                                                   THE ROAD LESS TRAVELED
                                                                                      
                                                   "I shall be telling this with a sigh,
                                                    Somewhere ages and ages hence;
                                                    Two roads diverged in a wood, and I --
                                                    I took the one less traveled by,
                                                    and that has made all the difference."
                                                                                        -- Robert Frost

DAY #9 (FRIDAY) - HOME SWEET HOME ... ALONE

So today I go home to Minnesota and leave Kathryn in California with a new nickname I chose for her:  "Cali-Kat."  I've "Rambled through the Roadsides," swam in all the pools, and checked out all the cowboys.   My stamp of approval has been put on her living conditions, the town she chose and definitely the weather (76 and sunny ALL the time...really???)

She has already started leaving her footprints in the sands of many of the beaches.

So why on this beautiful day do I feel sad?  Mainly because I go home without her.  Immediately a flashback comes to me of a day 27 years ago on New Years Day when I went home WITH her....one day she's not in my life, the next I'm going home with her.  Those 27 years now seem like 27 seconds.  However, I do feel good about her choices and also feel good about the memories we created  during this stage of our lives.

The road to the airport was uneventful...we allowed enough time not to get stuck in rush hour traffic.
Although the day was sunny and bright, out of nowhere it started raining.  Not a big deal, I thought, but as Kathryn commented, "How weird is this?  It almost never rains in San Diego." 

As I looked out my window I could not  believe what I saw...a beautiful rainbow!   Why so surprised?  Because on a day that was ending a trip that already included so many fantastic surprises around every corner, yet another surprise greets us.  I told Kathryn, "It looks like God is telling you your pot of gold is here!"

 

When we got to the airport, we said our goodbyes quickly as the traffic was building up.  Goodbyes are goodbyes...it has to be done.    Then something odd came over me.  As I looked at Kathryn I saw something I was not expecting to see....a very mature, young lady!  Her face was calm, she looked in control, she looked like she had all the answers....and I realized at that moment that she'd grown to an age where she didn't need me anymore!  She knew what she wanted and she knew where she was going!

 I suddenly  realized THIS trip wasn't about HER and her  "New Beginnings" as I had previously stated when we started the trip. This was not about her reliving HER first day of kindergarten!   This trip turned out to be about ME, about my New Beginnings....about me learning how to start over again in this new life called retirement!!

As I looked back I realized it was SHE who drove most of the way and took control of getting us (me) there safely!  It was SHE who ran back to a bathroom stall when I left my camera there.  It was SHE who noticed that I wasn't drinking enough water in the heat and got me started on Vitamin Water.   It was SHE who pretty much did all of worrying while I sat back as the "Happy Passenger."   She will be fine.  I am the one who will be making major transitions in my life from now on.  I could not believe how I was feeling!

I found myself mumbling "Mom-isms"..."Take care of yourself!  Be careful!  Slow down!  Work smart, not hard."  I couldn't think of anything more to say...it was as if after all these years,  I'd said it all...and she had heard it all.  "I love you lots," I said.   "I love you too, Mom!"  And she was gone.

As I walked into the airport I suddenly felt like I was walking into that big school on my first day of kindergarten!  It was the weirdest feeling!  I didn't know where I was going, I didn't know the people, I felt very alone.  Considering that I've been  a person who has pretty much spent most of her life being single, traveling alone, and living alone, it was an odd feeling for me.  I felt like I was 5 again....I wanted to run back to her, where things were familiar and safe.

After going through security, I bought a sandwich and sat in the seats facing the plane, waiting to board.  I tried eating the sandwich but I was crying  so hard that  the sandwich stuck in my throat, so  I threw it away.  Kathryn called also crying, saying she forgot to thank me for all I'd done, what a great trip it was, she really didn't mind driving.  It was tough.  We continued to cry and talk and then said our goodbyes again.  A tough way to end a tough day of an otherwise fantastic trip.

The trip home was nice and uneventful.  I was met at the airport by my girlfriend Joyce who brought me home and left homemade soup for me!!  She had been babysitting my cat Lily, who seemed like she was still laying in the same place as when I left her, apparently uninterested in the fact that I had been gone for 9 days!

The house echoed as I walked through it.  It felt eerie, quiet.  I looked out the backyard window and the whole yard looked lifeless....Kathryn's playhouse that her dad built for her (it seemed like only yesterday) looked shabby.

 The tree swing that used to hold Kathryn and all the neighborhood girls now hangs lifeless, no movement, even in the wind. 

The chairs that had been used for tents by neighborhood kids, that used to hold post-game soccer pizza parties, that seemed more than enough for relatives and friends, now stand empty.

It had been a long, tough, emotional day.  I ate Joyce's soup and went to bed.

DAY #8 (THURSDAY) -- VISTA -- CARLSBAD -- RUNNING OUT OF STEAM!!

On this day, Thursday,  Kathryn and I are both running out of steam.  She has now moved into her new place and her suitcases are unpacked.  The house she's going to live in is a very nice, clean and spacious home  located in the town of  Vista.  The town near Vista is Carlsbad, a busy, youthful seaside town with quaint, colorful store fronts that house coffee shops, donut shops, hamburger joints, clothing shops, surf  board rentals, bike shops, flower shops. 

Just like a mother who checks out the school and the bathrooms on the first day of Kindergarten before she leaves her child there, I found I loved these two cities and decided it was safe to leave Kathryn  here by this beautiful seaside town (as if I had a choice!!)  It definitely passed all of the "mother tests."... especially the biggest test:  "Could I  live here for a month in the winter months?  Oh, yeah! 

Even though on this day Kathryn stated, "I am so tired of driving," as she got in the car,  she still wanted to show me more sites.  She had been  the driver for  three-fourths of this trip while I was the "Happy Passenger."  Actually, she used her I-Phone to navigate us through the hills and valleys of it all as well as directions through the cities, and I paid for the gas!!!!!  AND the cowboy hats!!!

We drove through Encinitas and Del Mar, past Torrey Pines Golf Course, known to be Tiger Woods' favorite course.  Every curve brought yet another stunning view of the ocean with people swimming, people surfing. I was especially impressed with the fact that in some places alongside the ocean, and sometimes on a cliff above the ocean,  were campgrounds!   Yes, campgrounds like you see in Minnesota with picnic tables and RV's and tents, except these had an ocean view!  Unbelievable!!! 

We also stopped along the way for lunch at a restaurant called Ki's which was directly across from the ocean.  As we parked next to a Jaguar Convertible,  I wondered if when these people left the restaurant would they worry about making a knick in the side door of  OUR Chevy Cobalt!!!  We shared a plate of 3 fish tacos that was the best I've ever tasted.  All seating was on the second floor with the door open to the patio  and sea breezes blowing in.  It was Thursday afternoon... garbage day in Minnesota... but lunch by the sea in California!!

By 2 pm I was  back at the hotel and Kathryn went back to her home, hopefully for some much needed rest.   Evening dinner was to be with  Jordan, a mutual friend of Kathryn and Whitney's who requested to meet me also!  We chose a Greek restaurant and Kathryn picked me up after she picked him up.   Who I expected  to meet was "Just Jordan", a young friend.  Who I saw when I met him was an engaging, bright young man who looked me directly in my eyes (he had nice brown eyes!), shook my hand, adjusted the car seat so I'd be comfortable, then got in the back seat and asked how my day was!  Wow!!!  Someone who showed genuine interest  to a woman with gray hair!!

As we got out of the car I asked him how long he had lived in California.  As it turns out, he's a former Marine who served 5 years in the Intelligence Division and had done 3 tours of duty in Iraq!!   Such an honor to meet someone like him!  We three had an engaging and fascinating conversation  on everything from religion and politics (yes, it was civil!)  to family, food and travel.  It was  especially fascinating for me to hear his comments about my working in the American Embassy in Vienna, Austria and the Marines who get the duty of guarding the embassies around the world.  A great night with fantastic people to finish off a memorable trip!!!

LESSON FOR THE DAY:   Even when you're tired and exhausted, good food and good company will always energize you!!!

DAY #7 (WEDNESDAY) -- CARLSBAD -- (DAY OF REST IS OVER!

On Wednesday, Kathryn and I drove  along the coast to Oceanside and enjoyed the beautiful scenery.  I can easily see why she fell in love with this area,  especially the sunshine, sea shore, and surfing! 

Every which way I looked the scenery was not only breathtaking but so picturesque....no need to have a good camera as the natural beauty of the small coastal town made every picture perfect!  In fact, many of these photos were taken from my flip phone!!  (Yes, flip phone!!!)  And many were also taken from a moving car!

We decided to go to the pier in Oceanside and walk out to the end where there was a restaurant called Ruby's.  What a fun place that turned out to be!!  It was decorated like a 50's malt shop with red and white décor and the waitresses wore red and white uniforms with real true black and white leather saddle shoes.  Those were the coolest things in the whole planet for us "bobby soxers" during the 50's.  We used to polish them every day and night, just to keep that black and white color looking fresh!  (For those who don't know what I'm talking about, well, too bad....you missed out on a great trend!!) 

Of course the menu was also taken from the 50's....hamburgers,  malts and apple pie with ice cream!  Yup, we ate it all....well, we split it....but we stumbled out of there very full and satisfied!! On our way back we came across a lazy pelican sunning himself on the pier.  He also looked like he had just  eaten at Ruby's as his waistline and double chin looked just like mine!!

In the evening we had yet another dinner out with Kathryn's high school classmate Whitney and her mother Pam who Kathryn is staying with.  This time it was a fish dinner, excellent as expected.  After today I'll bet my waistline is even bigger than that lazy pelican on the pier!!!

Evening ended full and happy and sunburned!!!

By the way, below is what I call California's version of the "CABIN BY THE SEA."